Your Yes Lies In Christ
Wild In The Hollow - A Book Review

Women Are Scary - A Book Review

I received a copy of "Women Are Scary: The Totally Awkward Adventure of Finding Mom Friends," by Melanie Dale, from Family Christian Stores for the purpose of generating a review. Italicized quotes are from the book. The opinions expressed here are my own.


And great news! Family Christian has offered to give away a copy of this book to one of my readers. You may enter to win a copy at the end of this article.




I have a friend... She loves books just like me. We both like fine dining. Both of us could discuss the Bible for hours. In fact, we read it daily and share our findings with a group online. Once, as we discussed our women’s ministry at church, she said,

“I just don’t understand why women wouldn’t try to attend every event we do. Hanging with girlfriends is so fun!”


I have a friend... We slowly eased into our friendship over several encounters. Our relationship was secured during a weekend trip to Louisville for a “Women of Joy Conference.” She’s a bit of a germaphobe and I am, well, not. My son and her daughter are about three years apart and have very little in common. Our “dates” usually don’t include our children. We’ve each accompanied the other to biopsy appointments.




I have a friend... Who lives in another city hours from here. We get a chance to see each other 3-4 times a year and every time we cram in as much fun as we possibly can.  She has a daughter just a few years older than my own and they are forging their own long-distance friendship. Years ago, this friend moved from a girlfriend to a sister. In every way that counts.


Thinking about the friends I have and how varied they are, I could understand the book title: Women Are Scary: The Totally Awkward Adventure of Finding Mom Friends. Building friendships takes time and vulnerability.


In my ministry work with women, I know we have to do the work because we must have girlfriends. They fill a need in us that can’t be met by anyone else.


Here’s what author Melanie Dale had to say about our great need:

In the ‘burbs where I do life, we live in an independent, isolated culture. As I’ve traveled to uganda and witnessed material poverty in the village with which we’re partnered, I’ve discovered that my culture struggles with a different kind of poverty. We don’t lack food, clean water, or clothing, but we lack relationships.


The rest of the book, she explores this poverty of ours. She’s a creative, funny writer who offers real advice mixed in with the right amount of humor. For example:

I still go to these things called women’s conferences. They’re filled with lovely ladies and prayer and I’m always just a little on edge, like I don’t quite fit and if they only knew what was going on inside of me... you know, besides gas.


So, the readers go on this journey around the bases with Melanie. That’s how she our “dating” experience with our girlfriends. She offers tips for what to do, and not to do, when your friendships are on 1st base (acquaintances who see each other at activities), 2nd base (organized play dates), 3rd base (invitation to one another’s homes) and 4th base - or home plate as her husband informed her (hanging out without the kids).


In addition to laugh-out-loud moments, the book has its tender parts too. She suggests things you can do during group dates (2nd base). Organizations you can help like Ornaments for Orphans and Cupcakes Kids, all while you’re hanging out together. 


Melanie has a friend... who sits squarely on her homeplate. She and Rose no longer live in the same town but they text all the time and visit often. Melanie shared about her struggle with infertility. Specifically, one time she found out some of her frozen embryos didn’t develop. About the same time, Rose became pregnant. The friendship they shared during these very different chapters of life left me in tears.


If you need friendship advice, you’ll find it in this book. If you’re looking for a book that just helps you celebrate friendship, this book delivers. If you want to better understand the “scary women” in your life, she’ll do her best to help you understand. If you need to break up with a friend, or someone seems to be breaking up with you, she walks you through this too. She’s there to help.

We need momlationships because they help us to be brave. They give us strength to stick up for our kids when they’re drowning in school, to chase the dreams that glitter like diamonds nestled in our souls, to fight for truth and justice for the kid down the street or the kid across the work. My friends provide a safe place to wrestle with faith questions and marriage questions and parenting questions.


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