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For My Daughter's Future Husband, I Pray


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They were a Church Super Couple. He served as worship minister at the mega-church I attended in college. She was mama to four picture perfect children. I had images of this couple setting their alarms for 4:30 every morning, and joining hands to pray together before the start of each da


My family of origin was not quite like that (Ahem). Dad didn’t go to church with us, my brothers weren’t picture perfect (see what I did there?) and Mom worked part-time at a local school, while mothering full-time at home.


One Sunday morning, the worship minister’s wife was invited to speak to our college group. She shared prayers she’d written for her children and her husband. I took notes. I saved the handouts. I wanted to be half of a Church Super Couple someday. She spoke with such wisdom and grace. Knowing what I do now, I realize their life wasn’t the picture of perfection I made it out to be. No one’s is, and that certainly includes mine. They did do a lot of things right though. Church Super Couple or not.


She offered some sound advice that morning. Every single day, they invited God to work in their family. One particular thing she said really stuck with me. She included prayers for her children’s future spouses. All four of them. Daily.


This was a new, mind-blowing concept to me. Praying for someone who would be in your family someday. Raising your child the best you know how, with God’s help, all the while praying for his or her future spouse.


I took her advice to heart that day, and more than ten years later, when I had a daughter of my own, I began praying for her future husband, should she have one.


Here are some of the things I pray:

He would know the love of two parents. 


He Is part of a healthy community.


He goes to church most Sundays and the Gospel message settles deep in his soul.


He finds himself surrounded by men of integrity who show him how to love his family.


He would have good friends.


He values education, focuses on his schooling, and has a fulfilling career someday.


When troubles come, he develops a habit of prayer.


He might be able to learn life’s lessons without going through too much hard.


He’d learn to forgive, and know how to process feelings of anger and hurt.


He would realize the importance of family.


He has a mama he respects and can talk with.


Although he might foster crushes, God would prompt him to save the giving of his heart until my daughter comes along.


When his life doesn’t go perfectly, because it won’t, he’d realize the gifts of grace and redemption.


That he would be the answer to my prayers… and those of my daughter’s too.


I’m still praying for that spouse, and will continue to do so. It’s an ongoing invitation for God to be at work in this young man’s life. Praying for him changes my mama heart too. It reminds me I am raising a daughter to someday have a family of her own. Theirs won’t be a perfect union, but it will be one founded on the prayers of loved ones. What a wonderful beginning.


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The prayers of one mama for her future son-in-law
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